How do I relax? It seems like a simple question, but when I saw the WordPress daily prompt, I realised I didn’t have a quick response. This is not new to me, and I speak often within this blog and with friends about the constant need to seem busy, to hustle, to ‘be productive’. I always think I have achieved balance, because I do practise self-care in some ways, I go on nice walks, spend time with people a lot, binge-watch the odd show. However, there’s always something I feel I should be doing instead or a reason to get back into the ‘getting sh*t done’ mindset afterwards.

This week in particular, I decided to not make many plans and spend some time doing my own thing. I’ve been craving space to create, write, work on my own projects. However, I haven’t planned for just relaxing. Reading, doing crafts, or even just watching a film. I’d argue that having to plan in relaxing seems counterproductive, but when your brain is wired to always be or feel busy, it’s not as simple as deciding in the moment to switch off.

So from now on, I’m going to focus on ways to switch off. Not just sitting in front of the tv for too long in pyjamas, but actually being mindful of my time, making space for true relaxation without guilt.

How To Relax

This is how I’m going to learn to relax properly, and how you can too:

1. Reframe Rest as Productive: Understand that relaxation is essential for overall wellbeing and productivity. Rest allows you to recharge, think creatively, and perform better in the long run.
2. Practice Mindfulness: Engage in mindfulness practices like meditation, deep breathing, or simply being present. These practices help you focus on the moment rather than on what you ‘should’ be doing.
3. Set Boundaries: Designate specific times for rest and relaxation, free from guilt. Consider it as a non-negotiable appointment with yourself.
4. Engage in Joyful Activities: Find activities that bring you joy without any end goal—like reading, painting, gardening, or going for a walk. The key is to enjoy the process, not the outcome.
5. Challenge Your Inner Critic: Notice when you start feeling guilty about resting and challenge those thoughts. Remind yourself that everyone needs downtime, and rest is a form of self-care.
6. Create a Relaxing Environment: Create a space that encourages relaxation—dim lighting, comfortable seating, calming scents, or soothing music can all help set the mood for unwinding.
7. Be Kind to Yourself: Self-compassion is crucial. Remind yourself that it’s okay to rest and that you don’t have to be productive all the time to be worthy or valuable.
8. Reflect on Your Achievements: Sometimes, the need to be productive comes from a fear of not doing enough. Reflect on what you’ve already accomplished and recognise that it’s okay to take a break.
9. Journal Your Thoughts: Use journalling as a way to process thoughts and emotions. Write down any feelings of guilt or anxiety around relaxation and explore where they come from. Journaling can help you let go of the need to always be productive by providing a safe space to understand and challenge those thoughts.

Remember (and a reminder to self too), relaxation is a form of self-care that enhances your ability to be productive later on.

How do you relax?