Everyone worries about turning thirty. Especially women. The should-have-my-career-sorted, should-be-married-by-now, should-have-gone-to-the-gym-for-the-last-10-years, only-have-a-few-years-for-baby-making panic.
When I was under twenty, I thought getting to thirty was the be all and end all of life. The way the ‘adults’ would go on about turning that dreaded age, it seemed like maybe that was the age you’re supposed to have your shit together. Career, marriage, children, house, nice car. Over the next few years, I realised that wasn’t going to happen, and I didn’t really want it to just yet.
Despite my stand against the typical, I fell in love at 22 and am still with him now. We were in the process of buying our first property. I had a job that I was great at and enjoyed. I was nowhere near marriage or children, but after 7.5 years in a relationship, all was pretty good that end. I’d also just began losing weight that I’d piled on throughout my 20s.
I was killing this almost-30-year-old stuff!
Until January. Bloody January.
On the 12th January, 12 days before my 30th birthday, I was called into a meeting. Telling my boss to hold on while I grabbed my notebook and pen, I went in ready to discuss my role and plans for the company, which I was aware was struggling lately.
What actually happened? I was told to think about redundancy options. Sheepishly picking up my notebook and pen, I knew it was for the best, but still somehow hadn’t expected it. I knew my role was being stripped down and less likely to be a priority there, but still thought I had time to consider my future.
It’s an odd feeling. I realise it must be so much harder if you’re completely unaware that there have been changes, or if you’re completely satisfied where you are. However, even though I thought I should think about my career in the long term and start looking for something new, after 4.5 years, it was difficult to hear that I was no longer needed. In a company that you are dedicated to, work hard for, and feel like you’ve given so much to, you are redundant.
By the next week everything had been agreed and I was given my official redundancy (31st January). It was a week until my 30th birthday. The biggest worry, aside from needing to look for a new job was our pending property purchase. After some discussion we decided to still go ahead with it. That same week, we got a call to say the deal was done. I don’t think I could have possibly fit more adulting into one week!
Luckily, the flat has been a great distraction, but I don’t think I had a chance to really take stock of everything going on. I also had friends up on the weekend and we all went to see Green Day, which was super fun!
It’s now been one week since I became unemployed, and while getting work on the flat done and more time in pyjamas has been great, job applications, difficult renovation work and socialising have probably taken their toll a bit. Last night, I ran the Twitter chat, but then sat with pizza and a beer watching reruns of Fresh Prince on Netflix, and I didn’t realise how much I needed that!
Despite this, I am feeling in quite high spirits and pretty optimistic. It’s going to take some turning around, but I’ll feel amazing when I manage it! I’m looking forward to seeing where this all leads, and definitely think I’ve coped well with some massive changes so am a little bit proud!
I hope you’re all having a less crazy week! How has yours been? Have you ever lost a job?