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  1. I was once told that I could never understand what some was going through because of my tacit privilege….I replied with that I couldn’t understand why they didn’t want to help me understand why they were so angry with the world or why they thought I had any privilege at all just because I am straight and white. They don’t know about my childhood, education, my career path, my family….I could have been dumped in a bin at birth for all they know. All a load of prejudiced nonsense and another way to label others. I personally don’t care if someone is gifted something without earning it. Let people live their lives and try and be a bit more tolerant and we might all have a better time.

    • Exactly! Such a good point. It’s frustrating and completely hypocritical. I hate the labelling of everything now, I’m sure that’s what people wanted to get rid of at first, these little boxes that everyone is stuffed into. If others have an easier time of things then good for them! Also I do think you can understand something without living it. I don’t only have feelings on or care about the things I’ve experienced.

  2. I was once told that I could never understand what some was going through because of my tacit privilege….I replied with that I couldn’t understand why they didn’t want to help me understand why they were so angry with the world or why they thought I had any privilege at all just because I am straight and white. They don’t know about my childhood, education, my career path, my family….I could have been dumped in a bin at birth for all they know. All a load of prejudiced nonsense and another way to label others. I personally don’t care if someone is gifted something without earning it. Let people live their lives and try and be a bit more tolerant and we might all have a better time.

    • Exactly! Such a good point. It’s frustrating and completely hypocritical. I hate the labelling of everything now, I’m sure that’s what people wanted to get rid of at first, these little boxes that everyone is stuffed into. If others have an easier time of things then good for them! Also I do think you can understand something without living it. I don’t only have feelings on or care about the things I’ve experienced.

  3. So here I am revisiting one of the people that visited me in past month and what do I get? A damn good article. So yeah please visit me more often, leave comments so more often I have a chance to read something that makes me think. And despite the fact that I am actually, purposely not saying my opinion about this subject here I am definitely going to discuss it at home later.

    Connect with me:
    BLOGLOVIN: https://www.bloglovin.com/blogs/igaberry-13323143
    INSTA: https://www.instagram.com/igaberry/
    TWITTER: https://twitter.com/igaberry1
    WEBSITE: https://www.igaberry.com

    • Thanks so much! I’ve noticed quite a few have read this without commenting, but I’m happy that it’s thought provoking and bringing a conversation up about the subject.
      Thanks very much for reading and I’ll certainly be back to look at yours. I think I’m following you, but will check your links 🙂

  4. This is a truly wonderful, thought provoking post. I read it once, then I read it again. I sat and mulled it over before also showing my dad, who also adored it.
    A very well thought out post with lots of points for discussion!

    Alice | daintyalice.com

    • Thank you so much! I’m so glad that’s what people are getting from it. Glad you both liked it 🙂

  5. So here I am revisiting one of the people that visited me in past month and what do I get? A damn good article. So yeah please visit me more often, leave comments so more often I have a chance to read something that makes me think. And despite the fact that I am actually, purposely not saying my opinion about this subject here I am definitely going to discuss it at home later.

    Connect with me:
    BLOGLOVIN: https://www.bloglovin.com/blogs/igaberry-13323143
    INSTA: https://www.instagram.com/igaberry/
    TWITTER: https://twitter.com/igaberry1
    WEBSITE: https://www.igaberry.com

    • Thanks so much! I’ve noticed quite a few have read this without commenting, but I’m happy that it’s thought provoking and bringing a conversation up about the subject.
      Thanks very much for reading and I’ll certainly be back to look at yours. I think I’m following you, but will check your links 🙂

  6. This is a truly wonderful, thought provoking post. I read it once, then I read it again. I sat and mulled it over before also showing my dad, who also adored it.
    A very well thought out post with lots of points for discussion!

    Alice | daintyalice.com

  7. I totally agree with what you are saying. The bingo card is an absolute joke. I mean, I’m privileged because I made the decisions that the society I live in has told me I should make. “You’re not born a criminal”. Loved this

    Being privileged very much depends on the social and communal actors of the community you are in. I think I am just as privileged for being a white man in a majority white country, as a black man would be in a majority Black Country, or Asian man in a majority Asian country etc.

    When I was in Aberystwyth (Wales), the number of times I felt discriminated against for being English or not knowing how to speak Welsh. Also, at my job (a teacher) for being ‘too’ young. Now say I’m privileged.

    I totally agree with what you are saying about working for what you have. I am not privileged because I am white man born in a majority white country, I am privileged because I made the right choices in life not to be a criminal, to be educated and go to university. I haven’t just got a mortgage and bought a house because I am white, male, straight, etc, but because I have worked hard to have those things.
    Like you said, there are plenty of white straight males in the UK who are criminals and make poor decisions, are they still privileged though?

    The very existence of this idea of privileged hinges on stereotypes and discrimination itself. It’s backwards and counter productive. It’s like using the fact that you are ‘unprivileged’ as an excuse to not make something of yourself and succeed, where as I would use those as my motivation. Like you said “prove people wrong” which is what I do in my job on a daily basis because, you know, I’m “too young” to be a teacher.

    • Brilliant points! Sorry to hear you felt discriminated against in Wales, but you know I’m Welsh, and I can’t speak it at all, oops! Some people just look for a problem with you. Like you say, it seems counterproductive and an excuse rather than a genuine reason for any short-fallings. Even if the odds are against you, there is still a way to prove people wrong. There are people out there fighting every day for the life they have, but unfortunately this can be overlooked as the ones who aren’t doing that seem to be gaining a louder voice.

  8. I totally agree with what you are saying. The bingo card is an absolute joke. I mean, I’m privileged because I made the decisions that the society I live in has told me I should make. “You’re not born a criminal”. Loved this

    Being privileged very much depends on the social and communal actors of the community you are in. I think I am just as privileged for being a white man in a majority white country, as a black man would be in a majority Black Country, or Asian man in a majority Asian country etc.

    When I was in Aberystwyth (Wales), the number of times I felt discriminated against for being English or not knowing how to speak Welsh. Also, at my job (a teacher) for being ‘too’ young. Now say I’m privileged.

    I totally agree with what you are saying about working for what you have. I am not privileged because I am white man born in a majority white country, I am privileged because I made the right choices in life not to be a criminal, to be educated and go to university. I haven’t just got a mortgage and bought a house because I am white, male, straight, etc, but because I have worked hard to have those things.
    Like you said, there are plenty of white straight males in the UK who are criminals and make poor decisions, are they still privileged though?

    The very existence of this idea of privileged hinges on stereotypes and discrimination itself. It’s backwards and counter productive. It’s like using the fact that you are ‘unprivileged’ as an excuse to not make something of yourself and succeed, where as I would use those as my motivation. Like you said “prove people wrong” which is what I do in my job on a daily basis because, you know, I’m “too young” to be a teacher.

    • Brilliant points! Sorry to hear you felt discriminated against in Wales, but you know I’m Welsh, and I can’t speak it at all, oops! Some people just look for a problem with you. Like you say, it seems counterproductive and an excuse rather than a genuine reason for any short-fallings. Even if the odds are against you, there is still a way to prove people wrong. There are people out there fighting every day for the life they have, but unfortunately this can be overlooked as the ones who aren’t doing that seem to be gaining a louder voice.

  9. Whilst I agree that putting someone down and being hateful to other people is not helpful in anyway, I’d just like to throw some thoughts out there in defence of ‘privilege’

    I think the main thing about privilege is that it’s not used to make people feel bad about being a straight white male, but rather to say that straight white men don’t have to deal with the same type of discrimination that a not straight, not white, woman has to deal with. As in, a white man’s experiences in life are very different from those of non white people, and therefore will not receive the same racialised discrimination that a brown person will. And I think sometimes this is misinterpreted as being hateful or saying that white males don’t have any problems, but I think it rather points out that race doesn’t affect white people the same way as non white people and therefore their life isn’t affected in the same way. (eg, structural racism, casual racism, stereotypes etc. have an impact on poc’s life) The same applies for sexuality, gender and pretty much all the things on the bingo card.

    i think it’s really important to point out that yes, straight white men experience hardships and have problems, but non straight, non white people experience the same hardships ON TOP OF discrimination and oppression based on their gender/race/sexuality/etc.. and that’s kind of where privilege comes in.
    I find the narrative of ‘I’ve worked for this and you should just do the same as me and the do this the way I’ve done it’ problematic, especially from straight white males because they’re assuming everyone’s life is exactly the same as theirs and either have no idea or are ignoring the fact that race/gender/sexuality etc has an impact on people’s lives.

    So I mean I guess I’d disagree with you on the ‘Everyone has experienced it at some point though.’ As a mixed race girl, I can assure you that my white parent has not experienced these things, and does not quite understand the way race impacts my life, and the impact that has on myself. What I mean is some people experience it more than others and that’s what ‘privilege’ is pointing out.

    ah, this comment turned into a bit of an essay, I guess i’m just really passionate about these things! 🙂

    • Thanks for your thoughts on this. It’s always great to hear both sides. Please don’t think that I am ignoring the issues that may concern you. I do understand that people can be treated differently due to race and other factors that cannot be helped and wholeheartedly disagree with this. I am really sorry to hear that this affects your life. I am not sure where you live, but I do think in the UK it is much less prevalent than in other places.

      Regarding the ‘bingo card’, I ‘m not sure that I know anyone that ticks every single thing on the list, but most people fit at least a few.
      My main point is that I believe the term ‘privilege’ is being overused and can be turned into an excuse rather than an actual issue, which makes it all the more easy to ignore. In the same way feminism has become the butt of many jokes, it is worrying that something so important could follow suit.

      I understand where people are coming from when they have worked hard and it’s assumed it was easier for them, because that might not necessarily be the case. What I would hate to see come from these discussions is for white males to feel they don’t deserve to reap the rewards of their hard work just because of the colour of their skin. That seems to switch things rather than even them out. I can’t speak from a racial or sexuality standpoint really, but I can speak from a female perspective. If a male is promoted above me,which has happened, I do not automatically believe it is because of his position in life. It might be, but that’s not my initial thought. Ultimately, it just makes me want to work harder. I have definitely experienced sexism, but tend to put an end to it pretty quickly. I just don’t want it to be my go-to response. I am sure that’s not what you’re saying by the way!

      Something that I do think should be considered, and I may well get slated for this, is that the CEOs and the other ‘big guys’ at the top of companies are usually much older and have probably been in the business for a long time. As it is only fairly recently that we have had equal rights and education (which is of course an absolute joke!), I do think it has taken time to catch up, but I really do believe this generation is when things will even out with regards to education, work and other aspects of life.

  10. Whilst I agree that putting someone down and being hateful to other people is not helpful in anyway, I’d just like to throw some thoughts out there in defence of ‘privilege’

    I think the main thing about privilege is that it’s not used to make people feel bad about being a straight white male, but rather to say that straight white men don’t have to deal with the same type of discrimination that a not straight, not white, woman has to deal with. As in, a white man’s experiences in life are very different from those of non white people, and therefore will not receive the same racialised discrimination that a brown person will. And I think sometimes this is misinterpreted as being hateful or saying that white males don’t have any problems, but I think it rather points out that race doesn’t affect white people the same way as non white people and therefore their life isn’t affected in the same way. (eg, structural racism, casual racism, stereotypes etc. have an impact on poc’s life) The same applies for sexuality, gender and pretty much all the things on the bingo card.

    i think it’s really important to point out that yes, straight white men experience hardships and have problems, but non straight, non white people experience the same hardships ON TOP OF discrimination and oppression based on their gender/race/sexuality/etc.. and that’s kind of where privilege comes in.
    I find the narrative of ‘I’ve worked for this and you should just do the same as me and the do this the way I’ve done it’ problematic, especially from straight white males because they’re assuming everyone’s life is exactly the same as theirs and either have no idea or are ignoring the fact that race/gender/sexuality etc has an impact on people’s lives.

    So I mean I guess I’d disagree with you on the ‘Everyone has experienced it at some point though.’ As a mixed race girl, I can assure you that my white parent has not experienced these things, and does not quite understand the way race impacts my life, and the impact that has on myself. What I mean is some people experience it more than others and that’s what ‘privilege’ is pointing out.

    ah, this comment turned into a bit of an essay, I guess i’m just really passionate about these things! 🙂

  11. Whilst I agree that putting someone down and being hateful to other people is not helpful in anyway, I’d just like to throw some thoughts out there in defence of ‘privilege’

    I think the main thing about privilege is that it’s not used to make people feel bad about being a straight white male, but rather to say that straight white men don’t have to deal with the same type of discrimination that a not straight, not white, woman has to deal with. As in, a white man’s experiences in life are very different from those of non white people, and therefore will not receive the same racialised discrimination that a brown person will. And I think sometimes this is misinterpreted as being hateful or saying that white males don’t have any problems, but I think it rather points out that race doesn’t affect white people the same way as non white people and therefore their life isn’t affected in the same way. (eg, structural racism, casual racism, stereotypes etc. have an impact on poc’s life) The same applies for sexuality, gender and pretty much all the things on the bingo card.

    i think it’s really important to point out that yes, straight white men experience hardships and have problems, but non straight, non white people experience the same hardships ON TOP OF discrimination and oppression based on their gender/race/sexuality/etc.. and that’s kind of where privilege comes in.
    I find the narrative of ‘I’ve worked for this and you should just do the same as me and the do this the way I’ve done it’ problematic, especially from straight white males because they’re assuming everyone’s life is exactly the same as theirs and either have no idea or are ignoring the fact that race/gender/sexuality etc has an impact on people’s lives.

    So I mean I guess I’d disagree with you on the ‘Everyone has experienced it at some point though.’ As a mixed race girl, I can assure you that my white parent has not experienced these things, and does not quite understand the way race impacts my life, and the impact that has on myself. What I mean is some people experience it more than others and that’s what ‘privilege’ is pointing out.

    ah, this comment turned into a bit of an essay, I guess i’m just really passionate about these things! 🙂

    • Thanks for your thoughts on this. It’s always great to hear both sides. Please don’t think that I am ignoring the issues that may concern you. I do understand that people can be treated differently due to race and other factors that cannot be helped and wholeheartedly disagree with this. I am really sorry to hear that this affects your life. I am not sure where you live, but I do think in the UK it is much less prevalent than in other places.

      Regarding the ‘bingo card’, I ‘m not sure that I know anyone that ticks every single thing on the list, but most people fit at least a few.
      My main point is that I believe the term ‘privilege’ is being overused and can be turned into an excuse rather than an actual issue, which makes it all the more easy to ignore. In the same way feminism has become the butt of many jokes, it is worrying that something so important could follow suit.

      I understand where people are coming from when they have worked hard and it’s assumed it was easier for them, because that might not necessarily be the case. What I would hate to see come from these discussions is for white males to feel they don’t deserve to reap the rewards of their hard work just because of the colour of their skin. That seems to switch things rather than even them out. I can’t speak from a racial or sexuality standpoint really, but I can speak from a female perspective. If a male is promoted above me,which has happened, I do not automatically believe it is because of his position in life. It might be, but that’s not my initial thought. Ultimately, it just makes me want to work harder. I have definitely experienced sexism, but tend to put an end to it pretty quickly. I just don’t want it to be my go-to response. I am sure that’s not what you’re saying by the way!

      Something that I do think should be considered, and I may well get slated for this, is that the CEOs and the other ‘big guys’ at the top of companies are usually much older and have probably been in the business for a long time. As it is only fairly recently that we have had equal rights and education (which is of course an absolute joke!), I do think it has taken time to catch up, but I really do believe this generation is when things will even out with regards to education, work and other aspects of life.

  12. Whilst I agree that putting someone down and being hateful to other people is not helpful in anyway, I’d just like to throw some thoughts out there in defence of ‘privilege’

    I think the main thing about privilege is that it’s not used to make people feel bad about being a straight white male, but rather to say that straight white men don’t have to deal with the same type of discrimination that a not straight, not white, woman has to deal with. As in, a white man’s experiences in life are very different from those of non white people, and therefore will not receive the same racialised discrimination that a brown person will. And I think sometimes this is misinterpreted as being hateful or saying that white males don’t have any problems, but I think it rather points out that race doesn’t affect white people the same way as non white people and therefore their life isn’t affected in the same way. (eg, structural racism, casual racism, stereotypes etc. have an impact on poc’s life) The same applies for sexuality, gender and pretty much all the things on the bingo card.

    i think it’s really important to point out that yes, straight white men experience hardships and have problems, but non straight, non white people experience the same hardships ON TOP OF discrimination and oppression based on their gender/race/sexuality/etc.. and that’s kind of where privilege comes in.
    I find the narrative of ‘I’ve worked for this and you should just do the same as me and the do this the way I’ve done it’ problematic, especially from straight white males because they’re assuming everyone’s life is exactly the same as theirs and either have no idea or are ignoring the fact that race/gender/sexuality etc has an impact on people’s lives.

    So I mean I guess I’d disagree with you on the ‘Everyone has experienced it at some point though.’ As a mixed race girl, I can assure you that my white parent has not experienced these things, and does not quite understand the way race impacts my life, and the impact that has on myself. What I mean is some people experience it more than others and that’s what ‘privilege’ is pointing out.

    ah, this comment turned into a bit of an essay, I guess i’m just really passionate about these things! 🙂

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